Bite me.

youstoodmeupforayardsale:

coolhotdad:

my perfect crime? I memorize the entirety of the macy’s store inventory. I then go on aliexpress.com and find exact replicas of every single purse in the store. I break in at 3am, and replace every purse with a cheaper version of the purse. I take my real purses home and open up an online store on the darknet featuring fake purses. I then sell these real purses as fake purses, making it so that when the feds catch on to my antics, they spend countless years trying to figure out who can replicate purses this well, and who is selling them. Soon an entire division of the FBI is dedicated to finding me and figuring out how my “fake” purses appear to be real. 45 years later they finally trace my ip address and break into my villa in texas and shoot me right in the leg when i attempt to flee. While this would normally not be a fatal wound, due to my constant devotion to my online fake real purse storefront i have suffered an iron deficiency for 35 years. My blood can’t clot and I start to bleed out. Turns out the woman who shot me was a girl who i made out with once in college, and she holds my dying body in her arms and asks me how my fake purses were so real. I spend the last moments of my fleeting life telling her about how every five years i break into a different Macy’s and replace all the purses, and that the purses I have been selling online for a severely discounted price were actually all real, and I have been doing this purely for the gag of it all. When my former college girlfriend gets home from work after rightfully murdering me for my crimes, she goes into her walk in closet, looks at the 13 gucci purses she owns, and realizes that they’re all fakes.

this passed the bechdel test

(via rosalie-q)

i feel like this is important for black travelers who are driving long distances:

myscarsaremystars:

listentothesound0103:

randomslayerphoenix:

biscuit-tornado:

sad-but-rad-universe:

muse-of-mbaku:

lowkeylioness:

joncat71:

chubbygirlindreamland:

jlbi245:

laylamajandra:

alwaysbewoke:

cajunnspicee:

whatsavagesays:

ashrae720:

marley-gang:

sneakershoptalk:

narcissismonhigh:

blackgirlshit:

furbytheminx:

furbytheminx:

ankh-niggas-anonymous:

but what are some sundown towns do y’all know of? like if someone were to do a cross-country trip, what are some towns they should absolutely not go through?

Small towns in south ga and noth fla

Ga: Jonesboro, tifton, Albany, valdosta, Macon

Fla: Gainesville, Perry, Madison, Marianna, Quincy, Jefferson county, hell I wouldn’t stop in Tallahassee either

Texas: Vidor, Orange, Deep Santa Fe

Texas: Jasper & Lumberton

I’m from Albany and recently the police beat up a young brother for no reason. They were attempting to say he had drugs but he of course had nothing.

If you go to Stone Mountain and find yourself on the trails close to night leave because they still have active Klan rallys up there

I was driving through north Florida during the day and I felt uncomfortable

The Negro Motorist Green Book was guide for black folk traveling in the 60s. It’s gives a breakdown of sundown towns. 50 years later, I’m sure it’s still relevant.

I feel like the Deep South is just a gamble.

Ohio…just in general

Central Florida, especially the little towns. If you must stop to pump gas, pay away the pump and get outta there asap

Once you get out of St. Louis county start being careful.

St. Genevieve, MO is definitely a no go for me if I’m traveling south.

If traveling in Louisiana stay away from small town with low speeding zones. If you are to go into those please drive the speed limit and don’t stop for gas. You will get a ticket for tint of your car. If your military I pay you drive the speed limit and don’t have a military tag. Get gas in the daylight.

I’m glad you’re looking out for your bros, at the same time it’s a pathetic look at the country in the 21st century.

Saving this and reblogging for myself and my tumblr fam stay safe love you guys (also check the notes for comments on more cities to avoid)

Ohio: Hartville, Sebring, Salem are all in NE Ohio. Had the worst experience of my life in Hartville.

Mississippi. Just. All of it. Especially if you’re LGBT and a POC.

Someone else has probably linked this in another reblog, but because I’m seeing it, I want to share this info – Dr. James Loewen maintains a comprehensive site specifically for the purpose of listing historical and current status of sundown towns:

https://sundown.tougaloo.edu/content.php?file=sundowntowns-whitemap.html

If you’re going through NC try to go through Chapel Hill and Raleigh. I can’t speak for the rest of the state

stay away from most of AL, but ESPECIALLY Cullman. I grew up in Birmingham and that’s the only town I ever heard specifically referred to as a “sundown town”

It’s disgusting people still need this.

(via switxh-theorum)

writingllama:

“I’d rather listen to your voice than my favourite song.”

— Your Voice / Unrequited Love

writingllama:

“I just wanna make that boy the happiest he’s ever been.”

— I’m So Screwed / Unrequited Love

unconventionalbuthappy:

“You’re still the first person I want to tell every story to.”

— if only my brain is louder than my heart (23)

when—will—it—end:

You have no idea of how far I’ll go to get your attention

— Even just for a short moment

studyblr:

lazy mornings, open windows, foreign languages, used books, small cafés, excited text messages, art galleries, sundresses, cobbled streets, fresh air, filled notebooks, feeling completely at ease, content smiles

(via pahpens)

dateaboysuggestions:

Date a boy who wakes up in the middle of the night, rolls over, murmurs “I love you”, then goes back to sleep.

sonia7atm:

We already know we are being tricked but I can’t stop imagining strawberry blond babies

Man that guy who painted the Mona Lisa is pretty good

captorations:

candyredterezii:

candyredterezii:

anyone know if he does commissions?

Bad news guys…

lemme guess. that was his only normal piece and the rest is sherlock inflation art

(via rosalie-q)